She always dreamed of becoming a mother, but when the doctors told her that she was too fat to get pregnant, the dream vanished and so was her relationship. Since then she has lost almost 80 pounds and learned to love herself again: “I have reached a low and decided to look reality into my eyes”
Since she was a little girl, Australian Alida Dreyer (27) has suffered from bullying due to her overweight. “Ever since I remember myself, I’ve always been the ‘big girl’,” she told The Sun. “My weight led to me being abused at school, and the situation was so severe that I was absent from school for months in a row.”
Dreyer testifies that although she had ‘extenuating circumstances’, including being diagnosed with polycystic ovaries at the age of 13, her addiction to food was at the root of her obesity:’ The main fuel of my addiction came from my difficult relationship with my mother, who would always tell me I was fat And I don’t have to eat what I eat. I felt that food was the only thing I had control over, so to maintain control and to ‘do it’, I would eat whatever I wanted and when I wanted to. Cruel magic. “
At the height of her obesity, Dreyer reached a weight of 150 pounds and 54 pounds in clothes. She would eat about 3,500 calories a day, which consisted mostly of empty carbohydrates and snacks, and suffered from anxiety and depression. “I had to ask for an extension for the seat belt, and the armrest was slit in my body leaving bruises. I couldn’t even walk a hundred feet without my muscles getting caught, and in the hot Australian summer I was always sweating and bleeding. It was almost impossible for me to be in intimacy with a man because my body could not function as it should. “
In addition to Dreyer’s family, who continued to visit her and “remind” her that she was fat, she also absorbed comments from the environment: “People would tell me things like ‘You have a pretty face for fat’, or make noises as I walk down the street. I hated myself and started hurting myself. And I even considered suicide. I hated my body and hid it with wide clothes. I felt that no one could love me when I looked like I looked, so I became the girl who pleases everyone and agrees with everything. “
Dreyer started dating boys at 18, and at 20 she met her first serious boyfriend. But she said her relationship also suffered from intimacy as a result of her low body image, and she found it difficult to be exposed to her naked partner.
When she was 23, Dreyer and her partner tried to get pregnant, but without success. The doctors clearly told her that she would be very hard to move because of her excess weight – and after receiving the news, her partner decided to break up with her. “I’ve always dreamed of being a mother,” she says. “A month after meeting the doctors, my toxic relationship was also over, and my whole world was falling apart.
With a combination of a healthy diet and exercise, Dreyer was able to lose more than 40kg of her weight – and subsequently dropped another 31kg through sleeve surgery. In total, she lost about 77 pounds in one year and is currently 36, and continues to maintain her weight with a healthy vegan diet. Following the dramatic weight loss, she has also undergone four comprehensive surgeries to remove excess skin from all parts of her body.
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“Today, when I look in the mirror, I smile,” she says. “I love each of my scars because it shows my strength and tells how I overcame my demons. As a result of losing weight I also raised a spine, I started saying ‘no’ to people, and there were even friends who walked away from me. I lost more friends in my life in those years, but I discovered the love for myself, and realized that I was worth far more than other people thought. “
On her Instagram page, entitled “Half-Alida,” Dreyer tries to encourage other women who are on a journey to lose weight and improve their quality of life: “On my page, I choose to share my life without filters. It’s not always easy, but I hope I can help even someone One that is currently where I was myself a few years ago. “